we found hope.

i recently met someone who told me that they 'weren't really into music'. what?

i found this completely baffling because i don't understand how someone couldn't, especially at my age, be really into listening and enjoying music. now, i'm not trying to make out like i'm one of those who only ever listens to new music until it's discovered by more people and then i go back to looking for emerging music.
there's really nothing i hate more than an indie kid telling me about all the 'really fresh sounds currently in the belfast underground music industry. yeah, i go to a lot of gigs, bands you wouldn't know, i'll introduce you to some fantastic tunes'. - this angers me.


but i do think music is a huge part of my personality and i really couldn't see myself not listening to it at any possible moment.

so i told this guy (after i closed my jaw after that huge shock), that i find it really enjoyable listening to new things as much as possible and broadening my music taste. he then mumbled something about liking listening to radio one in the car and how a few of katy perry's hits are pretty good. needless to say, we had very little to talk about after this..

anyway, later that evening i discovered these guys and i think they prove my point that there is life outside of radio one's chart show.

(plus, when i @reply'd these fellows on twitter telling them that i really liked their music they replied back to me. twice! i got far too excited about it.)

a relevant song.

'i wrote him my letter of resignation on the plane to see my friend eric, who played a good distraction to me last summer when i felt hollow and disorientated at the lack of fulfilment from him. this time around i wasn't planning on kissing him, but i made myself so angry just writing words i thought a kiss would be the only respectable defeat. but a drastic measure like that would never be an option. i was no longer the same person as i was last summer.'

i thought i'd explain where i got my username from. there's this band: the rosie taylor project. and they have a song: lovers or something like it. it's a very good song, and they're a very good band. 

we woke in summer under the stars, tired eyes that are really just begging for more.

this song is very relevant i think in lots of ways. it was definitely appropriate at the time i was making this too. this band deserve recognition, their music is very beautiful. and although i'm very vague in explaining what this song means to me, you should absolutely listen to the rosie taylor project. 

second-hand gems.

i want to talk about the stories behind things you buy second hand. i read this book at christmas called 'will grayson, will grayson', it was very good i did like it. It's written by john green and david levithan who, i'm just gonna throw this out there, i think their own individual books are better than this novel of combined writings: just saying.

after i read 'will grayson, will grayson', i bought david levithan's novel: 'boy meets boy'.

i'd never read any of his other work apart from that of 'will grayson, will grayson' so after finding no new copies of it on amazon, i went ahead and purchased a second hand copy for only 1p. i quite like second-hand books because you're never that worried about the first tear of a page or the wrinkle in the spine, it's already been done, so you just get on with it. this book was fantastic. one of my favourite things about it was the fact that the person who had previously owned it had highlighted certain parts of it, parts which i think were probably their favourite. it was clear as i read it and i could see why they had highlighted it. it was beautifully written.
i obviously then took out a highlighter and started colouring away at lines and phrases that i loved too. (unfortunately many overlapped). i loved the fact that someone else had read this book and enjoyed it enough to permanently mark it in order for it to stand out. maybe i'm reading too much into it but i find it comforting. it makes everything connect and flow together somehow.



as you can see, i've worked the smiths yet again into another post!



it reminded me of a present i received once, from a friend who had bought me the smiths' 'meat is murder' in a vintage clothing shop in belfast. it was very thoughtful of him. on the back of this record it said 'happy christmas, love andrew'. obviously this item had a previous owner, it was bought in a vintage shop, but i could imagine that whoever andrew had bought this for, he knew they would appreciate the music and the effort and the gift itself. i hope the person who bought it for me felt good about giving me a gift they knew i would be very thankful for. i like the fact that there are similar intentions hidden there. it's a very nice thought, the idea of something being passed around different, faceless people in that although i don't know who andrew was buying the record for, neither did andrew know that it would one day end up with me. it's completely random and impersonal and yet intimate and personal. i like this juxtaposition.

(there's a few more examples that i wanted to talk about here but i really think the message is clear and no one wants to read any more about the stuff that i buy and accquire).

you can go into any charity shop and buy an item of clothing or a cd or a book or whatever and it will have passed many hands. and, at the risk of sounding annoyingly sentimental: it's a lovely feeling this sense of continuity that you get when it happens to you. just thought i'd write about it. lovely lovely.

this charming band.

a dreaded sunny day so let's go where we're wanted and i meet you at the cemetry gates. oh keats and yeats are on your side but you lose 'cause weird lover wilde is on mine.

the famous southern cemetery, manchester.

the smiths are quite easily my favourite band. i'm not going to get into a huge thing about why i love them or how their music was so incredible and beautifully written and poetic because i could go on forever and it's no secret that it's all true.
i have quite a lot of family over in manchester and i go over to visit quite a lot. last summer was a particularly special visit as i went over on my own to stay with my aunt and uncle. they brought me around all the sights to see surrounding the smiths: morrissey's old house, strangeways, salford lads club and ofcourse southern cemetery. i loved it. standing outside the cemetery i was like 'wow, they wrote a song about this. morrissey digged coming here. fuckkk'. looking back now i'm slightly embarrassed at how easily starstruck i was over a cemetery, some gates in salford and an old semi-detached house. i'm going back to manchester this august for a week. to see my aunts, to meet up with the friend i made last summer (shoutout to john) and ofcourse to revisit all the smiths hang out places. i am excited.

(i would just like to apologise for the awful title. it's not at all funny or witty, i'm sorry haha. not sorry enough to change it though. this charming band. haha terrible) x

don't want to sleep.

i wrote a previous blogpost on FM belfast and how they are abolutely infectious during these summer months. apart from the fact that their music is incredibly catchy and just generally happy, they seem like the coolest people ever. from reading updates online and through videos they seem so chill and i'd love the chance to see them live. they've played belfast a few times but i've always missed the show. there's time yet though (yn)

today the most summery day this year, FM belfast released their second album. i am so pumped. absolutely mental. summer is here and i don't want to go to sleep either is on repeat. an absolutely perfect album to come out on a perfect day.

to be honest, my favourite song off the new album is happy winter but it's not as upbeat and catchy as this one (there's also no video of it on youtube!) so i'll share this for now.
don't want to sleep - fm belfast. really hoping i'll fall in love with it as much as i did their first album.
hello summer time x

oh mis dios.

mi bitácora en espanol. lo siento!


tengo mis examenes de espanol a miercoles y, la verdad es que no me importa. tengo el examen de leer, escribir, escuchar y a jueves, tengo el examen de hablar y no creo que tenga mucho trabajo para este examen y otras alumnas en mi clase son estudiando mucho más que yo.
pero, al fin de cuentas, voy a hacer que puedo. quiero el verano ahora. como, ahora! oh mis dios, odio los examenes.
me ojala buena suerte?
(pienso que este bitácora es muy lleno con errors, desafortunadamente)


adios! x

colin murray.

so i'm the middle or rather still close to the beginning, of doing some english literature revision for my AS exams coming up soon. i'm trying to look over poetry by Liz Lochhead and Carol Ann Duffy and even though i quite like doing poetry work i cannot motivate myself for the life of me. honestly, this week i've done barely any work just cause i'm so exhausted. it's not very cool and i'm not appreciating my body right now for being so sluggish.

so i just put on last night's radio ulster show of colin murray's. i was huge fan of colin murray when he did nights at radio one. i listened every night without fail for about two and a half years; even if i had people over, 10pm was colin time, they just had to put up with it.
for those who are not familiar with murray, he's a radio dj hailing from northern ireland: where i'm from!
now, i'm not really a fan of radio ulster, in fact, i wouldn't dream of tuning in. (i actually don't listen to much UK based radio. i mainly listen to american radio streamed online!) but i will tune in for colin. i don't listen as regularly as i did with his old show but what can you do. i'm listening now and it's making me very happy. about four songs in: the flaming lips. good work colin. it's helping me get on with revision so once i post this i'm getting stuck in. happy saturday blogger, hope this weekend is treating you well. and if you get the chance maybe you should check out colin if you haven't already.

[i wanted to put a proper old photo of when i met colin murray when i was about 14 and had a horrible haircut but unfortunately i can't locate it on this computer. maybe another day!]

'i'll be around when all this fucking fashion brings you down' ..maybe not.

say anything remind me of two years ago. they also remind me of lots post '09 but it's mainly then. it doesn't make sense to why i'm posting this just know that it was what it was and it is how it is and it sucks. but it's okay to sometimes remind yourself of the easter of '09.

just don't watch i heart huckabees on easter monday. maybe that's it. 

future prospects.

so today, my last day of term before the easter holidays was really quite productive. i didn't neccessarily do any work in school, infact all i did was watch dvds in my classes, but afterwards i went to town with my friends for lunch and ended up one step further in finding out what i want to do at uni! (if you knew my completely scattered career ideas, you'd pat me on the back for actually taking action in sorting something out.) i've finally started to feel motivated and excited for leaving school and moving on to the next level.

for a while there, it was all a bit blurred about what exactly i wanted to do, and if i'm honest, it's still pretty blurred but i feel like there's finally some movement happening and things are getting in motion. this honestly excites  me a lot more than many other things in my life. it gives me something, other than good A-Level results, to strive for.

i talked to this woman, margaret, in terms of maybe what i wanted to do. she gave me some websites to look at and ways for me to think about narrowing my options down from what i told her: 'so, i want to work with people and i really like english'. but i've had a look at one of the websites and i think i may have found an area i want to work in. i'm not too sure, but i'm so pumped to do more research on it and get a good idea of what i want to do. so far a lot of arrows point to YES but it's extremely early days. i'm just happy i have ideas. ideas are great.

i'm actually motivated for the next two weeks. to catch up on sleep, talk to margaret a bit more and finally tackle revision. i have a good feeling about it; i hope it turns out as planned. it's about time something did.

'go do. throw seeds to sprout, make your own break: let them grow. we should always know that we can do anything'.

jónsi knows his biz.

FM belfast.

we were lying down in front of our house in the summer time. i wish i had a house in the caribbean, and we could go there: par avion.



par avion, or really, any song by FM belfast, get me excited for the summer time. the moment the sun peeps its head out from the clouds, a rare occassion in N. Ireland, the FM belfast goes on.


now it's not quite the caribbean or anywhere exotic, but i'd happily settle for bangor beach this july.

growing pains.

i just got home from a family dinner in celebration of my granda's 65th birthday. it was probably the most chaotic experience ever. (the fact that i've just penned a family dinner as my most chaotic experience ever is not only pathetic but completely untrue! what an exaggeration.) it's as if my family have to constantly be on the go. they always have to be in on what everyone else is doing. which is fine, because we're family, but the curiousity about everyone's business and what they're doing at the bottom of the table drives me crazy. for most of it i sat there dazed, in my own world. not because i don't want to be assosiated or involved with my family: it just required far too much effort.


as this school year progresses, my levels of enthusiasm and energy have just plummeted, but i reckon everyone's does. still, amongst this grogginess (is that a word?) i have an itching in my skin to see bigger and better things which in a sense is enthusiasm and vitality.


it's not that i'm overly ambitious or one of those teens who just has to get out of the city or town they're from for university otherwise they'll just die. i've grown to love the fact that belfast is the place i was born and raised and it holds so much to me; it's just time i started seeing other things. my favourite thing to do in the car - when i'm with my parents so i don't have to make much effort for conversation -  is to sit in the backseat and try and see as many people as i can and try and think of what they're like, or live like. it sounds kind of stupid but it truly intrigues me. i think now, or at least in a year or so when i'm done school, is the time for me to drive around watching people's lives go by in somewhere other than belfast.


manchester sounds refreshing..

this is new.

so, i've planned on making one of these like, a million times before. i make vlogs on youtube, and i'm an avid tweeter but i think i really needed somwhere to be able to write stuff down where no one else would really read it. obviously, i'm posting this online so it's not private: i have grasped that concept. but in all honestly, who would want to read some 17 year old's amateur writings.


i'm in the middle of my A Levels right now, and i'm not gonna lie, they're easily the worst thing ever. by calling this year an absolute nightmare would be an understatement but i'm very nearly done and in like two months i will have finished my AS's which will be the greatest thing ever. i cannot wait.


i think now's a good time to have something for me to do inbetween working and things. everyone keeps telling me that i'm supposed to make time for myself because otherwise i'll burn out; my 'me' time is consisted of pressing the refresh button on facebook and twitter. yesterday i made myself a dailybooth but effectively all i'll be doing there is refreshing as well. hopefully blogger will provide a much more productive outlet.


but hey, we'll see how it goes.